Screaming fans and Super bowl parties — that’s never been my thing. Sure, I’ll attempt to play sports for fun, but I really have no interest in them.
I can always sum up a game by explaining that the ball went in the hole, the ball missed the hole or someone won.
This explanation can be modified based on the sport.
The thought has crossed my mind often that there is a reason why men created sports.
I think sports and the terms within the sport can be compared to life.
Men are constantly looking for a hole so they can score.
Every man would like to be good at sports and score as often as possible. Every man is considered a player and proud of it. They all work on their game and try to improve.
Men have been known to take performance-enhancing drugs to improve their game.
Players might be taken out of the game for a while, but they all want a chance to come back.
Players might change sports and try something new, but it all has the same ending — scoring.
When men have sons, they want to teach them how to score.
They not only spend their life trying to be a good player and score as often as possible, but they want to teach their sons how to do it, as well.
Score boards and score cards are used to keep track of the number of times they score.
Baseball cards are even traded and collected among men to keep track of how well they have scored.
Sports are unique.
Men will pay large amounts of money to watch other men score. Men get so excited by these events, they will dress up to cheer on their favorite team.
Men aspire to be professionals. Fan clubs have even been formed, where men watch together.
Fantasy groups have been formed, where men can choose their teams and imagine what it could be like.
In basketball, men are chasing the ball up and down the court so they can put it in the hole.
While they are trying to score a point, they have cheerleaders cheering them on.
What man doesn’t like to be cheered on while trying to score?
Baseball is all too easy to compare to life. You have first, second and third base. One, two, three strikes — you’re out.
Some men strike out more than others, but they all are looking to score.
Take golf for example. The ultimate goal of this game is to get the ball in the hole with as few shots as possible.
Size matters.
Some men have long putters. Some men have short putters.
Men may prefer to have stiff shafts. There are hard balls and soft balls.
While some men are longer than others, they don’t necessarily score better.
This is the only sport where men can clean their balls in public.
If they are good enough, they can have someone clean their balls for them.
Technology has played a role in how often they score and how well they do it.
Men would like to have more control over their game and perform better. Technology has change the equipment men use to play the game.
In golf, shafts are longer and heads have become bigger. Balls and bats have changed. Everything has become better with technology.
It is no wonder men created sports.
By KATHERINE PITTELKO
Editor
kpittelk@ius.edu